Freezer Jeans

Levi Strauss suggested
That we wash our jeans too much.
Machines waste so much water
And we use them as a crutch.

The company wants us to know
That cleaning them’s a breeze.
You don’t need suds or washers,
You just pop them in to freeze!

That’s right – the freezer, which will help
To take away the smell.
I really wonder if that tact
Would work out very well.

It’s hard to picture, nestled
Next to ice cream, bread and ice,
My unwashed jeans and all because
Of corporate advice.

I’ll take my chances that the earth
Will not run out of water;
And I’ll keep washing by machine
Just like I think I oughter.

‘Cause sometimes good intentions,
Though some people they’ll appease,
Will have most of us just cluck our tongues
And utter loudly – “Please!”