Medicine Chest

Have you ever checked the items
In your bathroom medicine chest?
I did exactly that today
And man, I failed the test!

The capsules, ointments, salves and pills –
How they accumulate!
I tossed so many, I lost count,
‘Cause they were out of date.

Not by a week, a month, a year,
But decades have slipped past
Since certain of those vials
Ever were supposed to last.

I saved a few from years ago –
I have mercurochrome!
And No Doz – “safe as coffee”
From my former Brooklyn home.

I kept a box of Listerine
With coupon, fifty cents;
There is no expiration date
Or year it represents.

There is a jar of liquid,
Good for itches, like a potion;
If you meet a mosquito,
Try my pink Calamine lotion.

My favorite, though, is really old –
It’s purple and it stains;
It’s Gentian Violet for the mouth –
On my shelf, it remains.

In case you visit and you need
An Advil or Bactine,
Don’t worry – those expire
In two thousand and thirteen!